Gold took a sip of his tea to distract and steel himself. "I was much the same way, and perhaps had more trouble than most stepping back when the time for it was approaching. Then I lost him for a very long time. I broke a promise, and spent the better part of my life trying to make up for it. I wish to believe I did in the end. We reconciled, and then..."

And how hard it hits him then, and all the worst ways it conjures itself up in his mind, all of the ugliest, most painful ways it could be said.

"...Then he was gone."